Sekimori - Live Blog
A Voice of Reason (Isn't that Illegal Now?)
Because in the end, science offers us the only way out of politics. And if we allow science to become politicized, then we are lost. We will enter the Internet version of the dark ages, an era of shifting fears and wild prejudices, transmitted to people who don't know any better. That's not a good future for the human race. That's our past. So it's time to abandon the religion of environmentalism, and return to the science of environmentalism, and base our public policy decisions firmly on that.

I always liked Michael Crichton. Go. Read.

I do wish he'd provided links, or at least footnotes, to his array of claims. I'd like to read some of that myself and, well, I'm fundamentally lazy.

Posted 12/11/03
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Thus Spoke Zarathustra

It is my firm belief that not one single individual working for any government, anywhere, reads science-fiction. If they did, they would know the following things about their current (alleged) research into non-lethal weapons:

- Intense electromagnetic fields intended to disrupt short-term memory will instead turn half the population into brain-sucking zombies and force the other half to live like hunted animals...at least until the plucky kid and the mad scientist work together to reverse the effects.

- Microbes, genetically engineered to eat asphalt, plastic, paint, cement, lubricant and metal parts before dying at a predetermined time, would instead devour everything manmade on the planet, leaving us naked, feral and beating each other about the head and shoulders with herbivore femurs...until the highly advanced and benevolent alien race discovers us and lifts us out of evolutionary regression with gifts of space travel and excellent health care.

- Stink bombs, sedatives and opium derivatives will all fail in their intended purpose and instead create a population addicted to wild mood swings and smelly socks.

So let's all do our world leaders a favor and mail them copies of our favorite sci-fi novels...no cyber-punk though, you'll just get them all excited.

Posted 05/10/02
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Playboy Update

After an exhaustive search of this Playmate archive, I have determined that the Plastic Blonde Syndrome began around 1985.

Feel free to gather your own empirical evidence.

Posted 03/02/02
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Thoughts on Playboy

There have been a good many thoughts lately on Playboy magazine...no, not those kind of thoughts. From Hefner bashing to how to save it to even more ways to save it. Does it need saving? Oh yes, dear children, in so many ways. We're going to leave out completely the business aspects of the magazine (esp. the fact that it lost $30 mil last year) and concentrate on content and big-boobed blonde women. Begin.

Content

Aimed at the so-called playboy (a creature I personally believe became extinct sometime in the early 80s), ads for Harley Davidson and Buell motorcycles, FTD flowers, two different cigarettes and every type of liquor on the market litter the first twenty pages. The entire tone is elitist yet still lounge-lizard sleazy, the authors of some of the articles insist on referring to their male readers as "playboys" and ignore the female contingent completely. I'm not saying I want ads for tampons all over the place, but I think lightening up on the "ways to get more pussy" tone might be a nice start.

Big-Boobed Blonde Women

*sigh* If I want to look at Fembots, I'll rent Austin Powers. At least Cindy Margolis looks sort of like a real woman, not a slightly more animated Real Doll...now with vibrating tongue! Sorry. Oh to be an airbrush artist and work for Playboy. If these people ever stop working to sleep, I'll be amazed. The procession of identical blonde Barbies has become so tedious that even I get moderately excited when I see that so-and-so is slated for a pictorial. But as this layout featuring 80s pop tart Tiffany shows they're more than capable of taking at least something approximating a real woman and plasticizing her into their founder's ideal. The Survivor 2 vixen, Jerry whassername, was rendered dull and mannequin-like by their ham-handed make-up artists and creatively-paralyzed photographer. And if that is Belinda Carlisle's ass, then I am the queen of England. And I'm not.

There is some good stuff in Playboy. Things that are actually useful and, dare I say, revolutionary...

What Rocks

" After Hours section includes excellent scoops on useful gadgets, new erotica releases, drink recipes, music releases, etc.

" Playboy Advisor remains hilarious and sensible at the same time. It should be required reading for teenaged boys and girls.

" Raw Data is fascinating, including random statistics and factoids from a wide variety of sources.

" Asa Baber is one of the finest writers working today and always has something interesting to say. And when Cynthia Heimel sits in, it's like a little gift from the gods.

" Newsfront is probably the best section of the entire magazine. It keeps a skeptical eye on the machinations of our Puritanical bureaucracy, making sure we know about it when school boards or governments get a little Scarlet Letter-ish in the noble pursuit of making us all as sexless as possible. This should be required reading for everybody.


So, Playboy, let's have less plastic blondes, more real women. Brunettes and red heads, even. Women with perceptible hips, natural breasts and with no visible bones protruding through their skin. More 80s icons, you're pandering directly to my generation's youthful fantasies there. And stop the airbrushing. Women have freckles, moles and wrinkles (you can keep the plucking rule though, thx) and it's unfair to portray the idealized version as not having these things. It confuses some *coughsimplecough* people. And don't succumb to the temptation to go the Hustler route....when we want split wet, there are more than enough places to get that. And we won't even mention the peeing. *shudder*

Okay then, I'm glad we had this talk. See you next month.

Posted 03/01/02
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